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Birthday Fic for mtemplar_fic "Blueberry Stud-Muffin"
Hello Fake fans!

Here we are with another birthday fic. This one is for mtemplar_fic, who writes awesome Dr. Who fics about Ten and Rose, and has patiently beta-read many a chapter for me.

Today I had quite a nice peaceful day. I did a lot of chores and was able to get caught up on two episodes of Once Upon A Time while drinking peach tea and eating Maltesers. Anyone else out there watching Once upon A Time? If so, don't spoil me! I'm still two episodes behind.

Blueberry Stud-Muffin

by Brit Columbia

Fandom: FAKE
Pairing: Dee and Ryo
Timeline: Set on February 19th of Dee and Ryo's first year together
Summary: It's a lime, not a lemon, so don't get your hopes up! Birthday fluff between the boys. I wrote it in between doing many other things today, and no one has beta-read it, so if you spot any mistakes, please let me know.
Rating: This chapter is suggestive. Maybe don't read it at work. Hell, never open my LJ at work.
Disclaimer: FAKE, featuring Dee, Ryo, and Diana, was created by Sanami Matoh. I make no claim on FAKE or Ms. Matoh or any of her characters. No one paid me anything to write this little fic.
Author's Notes:
This is a happy birthday lime for my dear friend  mtemplar_fic.  Thanks for always being so kind and thoughtful. And thanks for my valentine!

Blueberry Stud-Muffin

by Brit Columbia

Dee entered the welcoming warmth of  the kitchen and unbuttoned his coat. "Smells good, babe! Are you baking?"

Ryo was standing at the counter working on something that Dee couldn't see. "Oh, hi Dee," he said with a quick glance over his shoulder. Did you get Diana's present?"

Dee hung up his coat on the rack of hooks beside the door and removed a small wrapped box from the pocket. "Yeah, but knowing the Sea Hag, she'll probably hate it."

"What did you get her?" Ryo clanked a spoon against the bowl he was holding.

Dee shrugged. "A watch."


"Yeah, why not? She's always wrecking her watches when she smacks her men around. A girl like that can't have too many watches."

Ryo looked over his shoulder again, his eyes sharp with warning. "Do NOT make any cracks about her biological clock this time, okay?"

Dee raised both hands. "Don't worry! I think I learned my lesson last year. It took that shiner more than a week to go down." He unwound his scarf from his neck and took a moment to admire Ryo's ass. "Whatcha doin' over there, sexy?"

"Just preparing some food for the party..." Ryo's voice trailed away, and Dee knew that he had just put his partner on his guard. He strolled over to investigate what kind of food Ryo was making.

He found his lover spreading blue stuff over a large, funny-looking cake-type thing. There was a bowl of blueberries on the counter next to him.

Dee tried to steal a handful of blueberries, but Ryo was ready for him and whacked him with a wooden spoon.

"Ow!" Dee sucked his knuckles overtly. It didn't really hurt, but he felt he ought to protest, just in case Ryo could be mined for sympathy.

No such luck. Ryo gave him a level look and said, "I didn't hit you hard, so save the theatrics."

Dee's breath exhaled in a forlorn sigh, but that didn't work either. Oh well, whatever, he thought, and eyed the lumpy looking baked creation. "Hey, didn't Diana specifically say she did NOT want a birthday cake?"

"Yeah, but this isn't a cake. It's a blueberry muffin. Diana likes muffins."

"Dude, if that's a muffin, someone shot it up with steroids."

"Okay, I'll admit it's a little on the large side, but it's definitely a muffin. I used a muffin recipe."

"Did the muffin recipe call for kiddy-blue frosting?"

"It's not 'kiddy-blue', Dee! It's blueberry flavored! To match the blueberries inside the muffin."

Dee grinned and quickly dipped his finger into the bowl of blue frosting before Ryo could stop him.

"Dee, get out of there." Ryo glared at him. "I haven't finished icing the ca-- I mean, muffin."

Dee shrugged. "Just wanted a taste." He sensuously licked a big dollop of blue frosting off his finger without breaking eye contact with Ryo.

Dee enjoyed the way that Ryo's eyes immediately fixed themselves on his long pink tongue as it glided unhurriedly over his finger. A slow tide of color rose up from Ryo's throat to his cheeks. Dee put on a little show for him, rolling his finger around in his mouth as he worked it with his tongue. When he withdrew his finger, he made sure he left a dab of frosting on his lower lip.

Ryo appeared to suddenly realize that he was staring. He successfully tore his eyes away from the spectacle and returned to applying swathes of blue to the surface of the giant muffin. "Dee," he said briskly without looking at him, "could you please open the wine and make sure that the wine glasses don't have spots on them?"

"In a minute," said Dee, drawing closer.

"Dee, come on now, the guests will be here--"

"In forty-five minutes, babe. C'mere."

"But what if someone arrives earl-- Dee! Let go, already." Ryo brandished the frosting spatula at him threateningly, but Dee just laughed.

He had his arms around Ryo's waist by now and he could feel the tension in his partner's beautiful body. Ryo's hard muscles moved under his hands as he tested Dee's resolve. Dee hung on doggedly and managed to turn him so that he had his partner pressed up against the counter.

"Dee, I know what you're trying to do, and it won't work, so you might as well give up." Ryo was clearly doing his best to sound stern.

"Babe, I haven't seen you all damn day, and all I want is a little hug and a kiss. Is that so much to ask?"

"You forget that I know you, Dee. There's no such thing as "a little hug and a kiss' with you. And by the way, you have frosting on your lip."

"I know," said Dee, letting his voice drop and tugging Ryo's hips closer to his crotch. "Don't you wanna kiss it off for me? I mean, seriously. Don't you?"

There was a brief silence while Ryo's eyes flickered back and forth from Dee's lips to his eyes. Then the spatula clattered back into the frosting bowl and before Dee even got a chance to wonder, both of Ryo's hands were cupping Dee's face and his tongue was sweeping passionately over Dee's lower lip.

"Yes," said Ryo, his lips only half an inch from Dee's. "But you knew that from the start, you bastard."

Dee's smart-ass retort was cut off as Ryo's hungry mouth took his in a demanding, searing kiss that he felt all the way down to his belly, and a little further south than that, too. Dee tasted the sweetness of the frosting, but even sweeter than that was the taste of Ryo's desire.

After a minute or so, Ryo drew back and further stunned Dee by starting to unbutton his own shirt.

"Sweetheart, what... what are you doing?" Dee found himself swaying on his feet, having been kissed into utter submission. He wasn't sure he could allow himself to hope. Perhaps Ryo was only teasing him? Ryo had occasionally been known to do that before. Maybe he was just going to get changed for the party.

"Like you said, you've been gone all damn day," said Ryo huskily. "I woke up in an empty bed with only a note to keep me company."

Dee grinned happily at him because he understood exactly what Ryo was proposing. But then he tried to look apologetic. "Babe, I didn't want to go. Could I help it if Penguin needed me to pick up a bunch of stuff for the kids?"

Ryo's shirt was now hanging open, revealing the planes of his chest and the taut muscles of his abdomen. Dee couldn't stop himself from staring. He wanted to cup those pecs in both hands, tease those pretty nipples and then lick his way down Ryo's abs. The vision of bare male beauty thwarted him by suddenly turning around and walking in the direction of the bedroom.

"Come on, hurry up," said Ryo over his shoulder. "We don't have much time."

Dee couldn't believe this was Ryo talking. He knew how much his darling hated rushing whenever Dee had made them late for something. Ryo must really be horny today.

"We got forty-five minutes, baby. A lot can happen in forty-five minutes." Trying to sound reassuring, Dee hurried after Ryo.

"No, we have twenty-five minutes, because we'll both need showers after," Ryo corrected him at the bedroom door.

"Sure, great, whatever." Dee caught Ryo in his arms again and nuzzled against the side of his neck. Yep, Ryo had a hard length of steel in his pants that needed to be taken out and polished some. "Like I was saying, a lot can happen in twenty-five minutes."

"Dee?" murmured Ryo and pushed on him gently.


"Go back and get the frosting."

Dee gave a shout of laughter and hastened to do as he was bid. So his sweet stud-muffin wanted to play with the frosting, did he? He wondered if Ryo had been thinking about him all afternoon. He had obviously come home in the nick of time.

Life was sweet indeed.

~end of Blueberry Stud-Muffin~

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Yay first comment!
That was soo sweet! Sorry, but I cannot believe that you wrote it "between doing many other things". It's just too good. Well, but maybe I should get used to your talent about time.
However, my imagination is running wild now thanks to the open ending. And I definitely need a muffin. *hungry again*
Oh, and before I forget it: HAPPY B-DAY, MTEMPLAR_FIC! :D

Thank you! I often have to write in fits and starts in between family and social stuff. There are always chores on the weekend too, like food shopping, cooking, and washing clothes. Plus, recently, my husband has wanted to spend an hour every Sunday reorganizing some part of our house. And no, he apparently can't do it by himself.

I'm glad to hear that your imagination is running wild. What on earth could two pretty men with a bowl of blue frosting and exactly twenty-five minutes be doing behind the closed door of the bedroom?

OMG, Birthday Fic! And how on earth did you remember that I lurve blueberry muffins?!? And is it wrong that I totally see Ryo setting a timer? *grins*


Sorry for getting to this so late - I came back from the DW con in LA (Gally - don't laugh!) late last night after spending most of the day at the airport/on a plane.

*loves some more* THANK YOU!!!! :)

I just have a really good memory about food, which is kind of too bad. Why couldn't I have a good memory for playing cards instead, so that I could go and make a fortune playing the blackjack tables in Vegas? But nope. Food it is. I sometimes stun people by telling them what they ordered at a restaurant dinner with me three years ago.

I'm glad you enjoyed your fic. I also put that bit of finger sucking in there for you, too, though I think you would have preferred it if Dee had sucked Ryo's fingers instead. Or vice versa. Hmmm. That could have been hot. Mental note to self: Put finger sucking in a future Dee/Ryo story.

I hope the DW con was everything you hoped it would be. It must have been awesome to be surrounded by Your People like that! Did your husband go with you? Can he hack the madness? Or have you managed to turn him into an avid fan by now?


My people? *grins* I imagine if I dress up as one of the Sisters for the next one, most people will know who I am! *grins more* I took Baby!Girl with me to the con - she was dressed up as a mini-Eleven. She is now a minor celebrity. I swear she had her pic taken a few hundred times AND she was filmed. People kept just giving her ribbons and what not. Madness.

No, the hubby did not go, which is sad, as he'd make an awesome Cap'n Jack if I could get him into the coat. He had to run my other two to ski practice, but he also cannot hack the madness. Although he hasn't ruled out going in the future depending on the guestlist. I have NO IDEA what guest would make him want to attend, though!

Edited at 2012-02-22 04:51 pm (UTC)

She is now a minor celebrity. Yep, 'indoctrinate' them when they're very young. Now your littlest will be a Dr. Who fan for life. The best part is that you'll have an ally at home! Soon you can both begin leaning on your husband to wear the coat. Once he gets a taste of celebrity, he'll be hooked. Then the other two girls will want to be on board just so they don't feel left out.

It would be unfortunate if a guy dressed up as Ianto strode up to your hubby at a con and kissed him passionately, however.

Yep, Baby!girl was a fan well before the con. One of her first words was 'Docker Hoo'. :) The other two girls are also fans. Strange thing is, the hubby gets very upset if we get a new ep and start watching it without him. *strokes chin knowingly*

Hrm. That *would* be truly unfortunate, as I'd have a minor freakout to handle as he's not a fan of that sort of thing. We were on a flight a while back where we had a flight attendant in a pink shirt/vest/tie combo who looked almost EXACTLY like Ianto, and here I was sitting next to my Cap'n Jack lookalike with 'Ianto' asking if I'd like some tea. Surreal.

It's good to hear that you have so many allies right there in the house! I predict that someday your hubby will attend a con with the rest of you, just so he doesn't get left out.

If only you'd gotten a picture of 'Jack' and 'Ianto' together! I don't know how you could possibly have explained such a request to your husband, though.

I forgot to say that Ryo probably would set a timer. And no it's not wrong because it's just so totally Ryo!

(Deleted comment)
And so you shouldn't! In fact, the next time you look at one in a bakery, visions of Dee and Ryo licking blueberry muffin crumbs off each other's fingers will hopefully fill your head.

Gaaah! *nosebleed* Dammit, now I really want a blueberry muffin! I had a blueberry scone this morning, but it's not the same, and now I want a muffin! With frosting! XD

They're goooood with frosting. As research *ahem* for this story, I made a small quantity of blueberry frosting. It turns out it wasn't blue. The blueberries made it purple, so Ryo would have had to use blue food coloring to get it 'kiddy-blue' as Dee said.

Muffins are basically cake, in my opinion. Ryo secretly thinks so too, although he will swear to Diana that the two are totally different and he did NOT bake her a cake.

Hi from Moon!

I love Ryo being unpredictable; Dee deserves a break now and then! This is a very nice vignette; and I can imagine Ryo turning crimson with embarrassment when Dee announces at the party how he 'helped' frost the (not)cake!

I'm sure Ryo looks very good in kiddie blue :)

Speaking of Diana...Is "Driven" ever going to be completed? Last I recall Berkeley was trying not to crap himself while DeeDee nearly totaled his car.


He's going to frost a (stud) muffin! And he might get frosted back, too.

Once in a while Ryo capitulates to Dee's seduction efforts and then gets all bossy. It keeps Dee nicely off balance.

Yes, you can depend on Driven being completed. I'll never leave any of my stories incomplete, even though it may take me a while to finish some of them. I thought of Driven while I wrote this little story because it mentions Diana and her hardassery.

I don't know when I'm going to get to it, though. I have yet to finish chapter 21 of Justice because I didn't work on it the weekend just gone, which means that I've got to get it done and out to the betas by this weekend at the latest. I hope I get some slow time at work this week!

Thanks for reading and commenting, Moon. I hope you're having a good week so far.

As soon as the icing was mentioned my thought was: "Uh oh... I think I know where this is going!" :D I kind of want a giant muffin for my birthday cake now, but I know that I'll get the same one I ask for every year. My mom always make me a vanilla cake with fresh whipped cream and covers in in strawberries, apricots, and plums. So delicious!

I can only imagine how hard Diana must have punched him for his comment. :P It's always a shock when I see that name since it's mine I go: "Me?!" and then I remember.... >_< Silly Neengy!

A Happy Birthday to Mtemplar_fic!


Yes, silly Neengy! I don't think you have to worry about your biological clock for many years yet, and even if you were worrying about it, you would probably never punch Dee so hard that you gave him a black eye that lasted a week.

Your mom's cake sounds so yummy. I make a vanilla cake that's covered in whipped cream and has layers of cream and jam, but I usually don't use fresh fruit unless I have reason to believe that it will all be eaten within 24 hours. I cover my cake in toasted coconut and walnuts (or toasted slivered almonds )instead! God, I love coconut. So tasty and lasts for days.

Have you ever had English trifle? I bet you would love it. Now you've got my mind going in dessert directions. I want whipped cream! But I can't have any because it's bedtime.

A hard length of steel in need of polishing? I gotta say, Brit, out of all the euphemisms I've seen in print for the human penis, that's a new one. Tell the truth, did you swipe that from a Steele novel or did you actually come up with that one yourself? If it's the latter, you're scary!

Oh Dee, you won the lottery today. After Ryo's swabbed in blue frosting, might want to take a picture to commemorate the moment.

In truth, I came up with that myself. Well, actually from the person I become when I go inside Dee's POV. I've honestly never read a Danielle Steele novel, although I remember when two of my friends in high school were going crazy for her. I tried, but she didn't pass the page test. The page test is where I open a book to a random page, read the whole page and then ask myself if it's worth spending umpteen of my limited free time hours reading it. If the answer is no, then I don't bother.

Thanks for noticing that, BTW! Rightly, wrongly or purply, that was my favorite line in this little story.

Edited at 2012-02-22 07:37 am (UTC)

(Deleted comment)
Well, we all know he has his sassy side. And Dee just goes along with it because there's a part of him that gets off on the novelty of Ryo taking charge and giving orders.

'Studs in the kitchen' was my little marketing attempt to make people go clickety-click, no matter what! Even if they weren't in the mood for a fluffy Dee/Ryo one-shot lime.

In fact, I would go so far as to say that if someone wrote a book entitled Studs in the Kitchen, lot of people would buy it just for the hell of it.

Thanks for reading and grinning!

Hi there!!

Thank you for sharing this birthday fic - Happy birthday to mtemplar!

This really made my day today also. Came home after a very ‘disappointing day’ and jumped on the laptop after a few days away, and as usual, my first stop; when I get a chance, is you!!

Then I was met with a lovely interlude to work, home and children.

A nice way to break the monotony of life and wholly appreciated the escape and imagery!!!



Hi FM!

I'm sorry you had a disappointing day. I'd be willing to bet that was an understatement. I've certainly had my share of days like that, and I know exactly what you mean. Glad I could be part of the happy!

Oh yum! Now I am going to dream about Ryo licking the blue frosting off Dee. Such a bliss!! :)


Ah, but which parts of Dee?

That's the question of the day. If only they had more than twenty-five minutes!

I'm already wishing I had written the next part. I'll have to do this in another story with chocolate sauce or something.

Ah let's see - Dee's lips, his chest then abs and I see a frosting blow job lurking right around the corner.

Yeah, it would have been fun to read about the next 25 minutes. But I like the idea of chocolate sauce even better - Dee and chocolate would be a combination out of this world!

I so agree, chocolate addict that I am. Dee and chocolate. Why did I never think of that before?

LOL! Perfect! You found some studs in the kitchen, all right.

My fave is the guy with the salad. If there was ever a show like this on TV, I would clear. my. schedule. to watch it regularly.

Hmmm, the Cooking channel needs to get on that as a pay-per-view thing.

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